Sometimes I feel like that Fruit of the Loom commercial where the waffle is jumping up and down, hoping to be noticed in the crowd. I live a very solitary life, and sometimes I feel like I will explode with all these things inside of me that I need to share. So many thoughts and feelings that need to be released. Many times my mind races ahead, and when I do talk to someone I sound mad or angry or like a know-it-all, because I have already looked at all sides and made my justifications and arguments already, and so I am too impatient to do again. My family thinks I am crazy, and maybe I am. Maybe they are. Probably we all are. One good thing tho, I am not unhappy with my own company. Just don’t like it all the time.
I am not the sort of person tho, to inflict myself upon people without a specific invitation. Therefore, I am left behind many times, sometimes blatantly, and I have to wonder why I feel so bad then. I would never dream of making plans with someone while someone else is sitting there listening, that maybe would like to be invited too. It’s just not in my nature to be so rude, and I don’t know why other people do it. It is my own dang fault for being so passive about it. I should speak up, and jump up and down like that waffle, and say, Hello, I am here, what about me?????? If a waffle can do it, why can’t I?
Cause I just keep waiting for that invitation dammit…….