Right Between the Eyes

My little kitten Ozzy is growing up to be quite the lil’ man.  He flies through the house like a cat on fire.  He leaps, he bounds, he jumps, he rolls.  And that is before he gets all riled up.  You know.  When a cat gets a wild hair up his butt and pins his ears back and goes on mission.  Not sure what the mission is, he just needs to do it NOW.

I am not a cat rookie.  Had cats most of my life.  I have a sneaking suspicion that my first cat Callie has returned in the body of Ozzy.  She was a holy terror too.  Ozzy is non-stop until he crawls up my body to my shoulder area and plops down into a purring sleepy kitten ball, kissing my nose and patting my face.

After all these years with cats, I think I can read their minds fairly well.  With Ozzy, it’s all about how much he can get away with before Mama stops him with a loud resounding NO, or a squirt from the water bottle.  Ozzy favorite spot is the kitchen island counter top.  Mama doesn’t want kittens on countertops.  So we play the same game every day, over and over.

Ozzy:  I think I’ll jump up on the kitchen stool and then onto the island top to see what’s new up there.

Mama:  Where’s that dang cat, I bet he is on the countertop.

Ozzy:  Oh no, here comes my Mama, quick, hide behind the flower vase!

Mama:  You silly lil’ man, Mama can see you.

Ozzy:  Uh oh, I forgot to close my eyes!  If I close my eyes she can’t see me!











Mama:  Ozzy, I still seeeeeeeeeeeeeee youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.  Now get down!

Ozzy:   Ok, I’m gonna make a break for it and scamper really fast, past the glass dish and salt and pepper shakers and hide behind her purse.  Dang it, why can’t she get a bigger purse?

Mama:  Alrighty then….SQUIRT!

Ozzy:  I better high-tail it back to the stool!  If I crouch down, then she can’t see me!

Mama:  Ozzy, I see your ears.

Ozzy:  Ok, I’m gonna just take a quick peek











Mama:  SQUIRT!

Ozzy:  Oh man!  Right between the eyes!  Ok, I just wait a second and try again….

Mama:  SQUIRT!

Ozzy:  Right between the eyes again!  She’s a good shot.  I better try later.  Much later.  Yawnnnnn and stretchhhhhhhhhh.  Time to go back to the bay window and lounge in the sun.  I need a cat nap.

Mama:  That silly kitty.  He’ll never learn, lol.

Ozzy:   Pssst!  Don’t tell Mama I’ve prolly used up several of my lives already playing kamikaze jumping off the railing and down the stairs!