I do not perspire, I SWEAT!

It’s March.  In Chicago. The A/C is on.  This is to prevent the massive rivers of sweat that cascading down my face, soaking my hair and blinding my eyes, and trickling between my breasts.

Obviously this is not an acceptable condition, especially for a woman.   I suppose I could blame this on a whole bunch of things, like age, weight, mentalpause, etc., except for the fact that I had rivers of sweat since forever, when I was young and skinny and not mental….yet.  I am the woman who never owned a winter coat.  No need.  I am my own furnace.

We broke the 80 degree record yesterday.  It has been a very warm winter.  Seems like we are also skipping spring, and rolling right into summer.   I have put away all the winter garb and stocked my closet with summer stuff.

Yesterday I saw boaters, walkers, bikers, you name it.  Everybody outside enjoying the warmth and sunshine.  Not me.  Nope. No way.  I stayed inside my nice cool house, where I was sweating anyway.  But at least I can have a fan blow on me to soak up the sweat.

I am so desperate that I ordered something called “Sweat Block” wipes online.  In fact, it just arrived at my doorstep.   It was designed for armpits, but can be used elsewhere.  My armpits are fine.  I am a sweat head.  I am gonna take these sweat block wipes and do my entire head, from scalp to face.  Supposed to last for 7 days.  If it lasts for 7 hours, I’ll be happy.  I’ll be sweat free.

I’ll let you know how it works……

P.S.  To all you men out there who are laughing at my expense….don’t be a hater.  Sweaters are women, too.

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12 thoughts on “I do not perspire, I SWEAT!

  1. I remember being told women don’t sweat, for ladies ‘perspire’. Whatever. It was all sweat to me. Especially when I was a tennis loving teen.

    My gosh, 80 degrees!!! But I actually would love that! My son & me moved from West (warm) Australia to the east (cooler), & I do miss that crazy heat.

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  3. so glad to hear that worked! I’ve had the same problem all my life. I’ve also never owned a coat! Do you turn really red in the face, too? If so, did the SweatBlock make any difference? I dont see why it would, but I thought I’d ask…

      • hmm, never occured to me to stop drinking 😉 ! but i’m sure you’re right. being overweight and having hot flashes makes the whole thing bad enough. Have you ever noticed that whatever condition you have, the doctors and the internet inevitably say to eliminate stress, caffeine, alcohol, and fats; then increase exercise, sleep, meditation, and cheritable donations? (ok, the last one was mine, but it seemed to fit).

        Im going to order the sweatblock, and see what happens. to be “purely scientific” (i.e; lazy and self-indulgent) I won’t change anything else! I’ll let you know the results. FYI, I found your blog from their website…

  4. Are you still using it on your face and head? Have you had any problems doing that? Does it make your hair yucky? Sorry for all the questions but you started it. lol

    • Typically I will put it on at night before bed so it has time to soak in and work its magic overnight before I shower.

      It’s funny, I don’t sweat at all during the winter, but as soon as summer comes and the humidity creeps up, I’m a sweat machine!

      • Thanks. I’m the same way and it drives me crazy not being able to wear makeup or keep my hair decent in the summer. I tried it last night for the first time and will see how well it works today. I put it all along my hairline and it didn’t leave a film or sting at all for me. I hopeful!

  5. Okay ladies, so where are all of you now, using it on your face and head? SO curious, as I have this problem, too. My entire body gets soaked with the slightest bit of warmth or humidity. My head and torso, especially, just drip. It’s very lovely.

    The sweating has interfered with my willingness to participate in certain activities. Mine is caused primary, btw, I am sure, by my SSRI antidepressant, but now that I am peri-menopausal, it has gone to quantum-unacceptable levels.

    I don’t like the idea of lathering myself in aluminum chloride (14% in Sweatblock) any more than I already do with my regular deodorant, but I am considering it, because this is such an issue. But I am going to check with my doctor about what I just saw on another site, the use of one of two medications, benztropine or cyproheptadine, for excessive sweating. I haven’t researched either of these online yet but thought I’d share the names anyway. I have no idea if they are effective or what the side effects may be.

    Anyway, I am wondering how you all have continued to do using Sweatblock on your face and scalp? Much appreciated, and thank you for this blog!

  6. PS: From a very quick overview just now, It looks like the two above meds may be used with medication-induced sweating primarily if not exclusively. That’s good for me but maybe not others.

  7. Pingback: Women Sweat Too | Sweat Block

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