Lip Service

friend

When is a friend not really a friend?  How do you tell?  What are the signs?

Sometimes it is not really apparent.  Some “friends” say all the right things, and then do all the wrong things, or just nothing. I call that lip service.

I found this out when I was in the hospital so much the past few months.  I have a lot of acquaintances, and some friends that I thought were good friends.  When it was all said and done, some of my so-called good friends turned out to be non-existent friends when the chips were down.

I was pleasantly surprised by all the phone calls, cards and visitors I had.  Conversely, I was heartbrokenly surprised by some of the people who didn’t bother to do any of the above.  Asking my sister if I was alive or dead doesn’t count.  Face to face baby.  That’s what I need.  Or Facebook to Facebook.  Many people kept up with my stories on Facebook, and gave me so much encouragement!  I love you all for that!

I am not always a good friend.  I don’t always go out of my way, or go the extra mile for a friend.  I have plenty of excuses myself.  So I don’t blame people, I really don’t.  I understand that people have their own worries, families, jobs etc.

My family really did step up to the plate and help me out, for a longggggg time, like two months, when I was pretty much helpless and could not have survived without them.  My sister especially really surprised me cause she hates hospitals and sick people, but she took really good care of me.  My little 4-year-old great niece loved the blood and guts aspect of the whole thing, and personally disposed of all the bloody bandages with glee.  I think she will grow up to be a doctor, she is so caring and compassionate, with both people and animals.  So maybe a vet, which is just as awesome.

friends

Now that I am on the mend, and don’t have to rely on people anymore, it just struck me how surprising it was overall, on who stepped up to the plate, and who didn’t.  Not that I’m keeping score or anything.  Really.  I’m not.  But I do know after all this that I will try much harder in the future to be a good friend, and not a lip service friend.

Cause isn’t that what life is all about?

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2 thoughts on “Lip Service

  1. Truly, when you’ve been through something major, you have a better understanding of what it means to step up to the plate. You know what it means to others to be there for them. And you also know that it hurts when they don’t. We are all built differently, and for some people, it’s really difficult to step outside their comfort zone. I get that too. Some of us are naturally more “relational” ……..others not so much. So it’s good to NOT keep score, but just take what you’ve maybe learned and apply it. We all go through stuff for a reason. Nothing in this life is by accident. It’s by design. Love you much!

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