But when I received the text that he was in love, I wasn’t sure exactly how to respond. Panic? Grateful? Unsure? Happy?
So I let it sit for a bit. Then I responded that “my feelings have grown too”. And they have. But I’m just not sure that I want to start throwing that “L” word around. That kind of word gets you into all kind of trouble. Trouble that I paid for twice with failed marriages, that cost me a fortune in terms of emotions, feelings, and yes, money.
I am happy that somebody loves me. I’m a hard person to love. My family tells me that all the time, lol, and I’m sure that’s why I’m still single. I’m too persnickety. My sister says I have a circus mirror in my bedroom, and when I look in it, I still think I’m 21, with long hair and a hot bod. Ummm, no I don’t, but I still think of myself as younger in my head. Like when I picture myself, it’s not quite reality. Oh well.
I’m not sure yet what I’m going to do about the new information. I think I will let it percolate for a little while and see where it goes. He’s not perfect, but God knows, neither am I. Maybe we are a match made in Heaven! Not sure, don’t know if I buy into that whole “God created one person for you” thing. This world is too big for that. I am too tired to search the globe!
One of my fellow bloggers just recently stirred up a real shit storm on his blog when he broke up with his girlfriend. He puts most of his personal life into his blog, and has thousands of followers. Including his girlfriend. So she is privy to all his private thoughts and feelings about her and everything else in this world. Not sure if that is a good thing. Also, I’m not sure if MY person reads my blog. He expressed interest in it, but I’ve never given him the website. But I DID get him going on a smart phone, and I’m sure he could eventually find this. I don’t know how I feel about that. I kind of like being able to talk about “things” without repercussion of stepping on somebody’s toes or hurting their feelings etc.
Ah, the perils of being a blogger. Thank goodness I am not a popular one!