The Evolution of Ellen

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I have always been a huge fan of Ellen Degeneres. I loved her standup comedy. I thought she was pretty, and very likeable. I used to watch her comedy specials on Showtime back in the 80’s. She was funny without being crude, and I liked her laid back style. She reminded me a bit of Jerry Seinfeld.

Her TV show was standard weekly watching fare. I can’t say I was 100% surprised when she came out on her TV show. But I can say that I was saddened that they cancelled her show because of it. It made no difference to me if she was gay or not. What she was was a very talented comedian and actress. And brave. Very brave. She did something that few would have done, back then. We were not very tolerant, back then. It takes us awhile to warm up. Baby steps.

So I always did admire her. When she came as a talk show host, she was awesome, simply awesome. It was the perfect platform for her. She could tell jokes, dance, sing, talk….what not to like?

And her look started to change, gradually. Over the years her hair got a little shorter, her style of dress a little less feminine.

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It wasn’t shocking, we all knew she was gay. Her relationships played out in the press, but there were only a few. When she started dating Portia Di Rossi, I was taken aback a little bit, but only because I didn’t know Portia was gay, as she played a sexy blond lawyer on my favorite show Ally McBeal. Just goes to show you that looks don’t define sexuality. Plenty of tomboys out there that are straight, and plenty of girly girls out there that are gay. Fine by me.

I was happy when Ellen and Portia were able to be married. I don’t have any religious objections to it. I only want people to be happy. I don’t really understand everything about being gay, whether it is biological or environmental or a little of both. As I’ve said before, don’t care.

Ellen is now a part of our everyday lives, at least mine. I watch her show, I see her on the award shows. She has done a bang up job as host, and I can’t wait for the next Academy Awards show this Sunday. I will leave you with this final portrait of Ellen, with boy short hair, and suit and bow tie. She makes a very handsome woman!  Baby steps.

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They’re back! Those lovely Chantix dreams

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When I quit smoking forever ago, I took Chantix, because I didn’t think I could do it myself. I had failed once before after being smoke-free for exactly one year. I quit on my small bowel resection surgery day, and started up again on the one year anniversary when I was fired from my job after a hostile take-over. (Beware of smiling faces. They don’t tell the truth. Tell lies and I got proof).

But I digress. (There goes that whole “my life is a song lyric” thing). So I bought a pack of cigarettes, to deal with the stress. Only a pack. Until the next day, when I bought a whole carton.

I sure wasn’t proud of myself. In fact I was so ashamed I tried to hide it, and only smoked in the privacy of my own home. In the bathroom with the fan on. Like back in high school. Except I didn’t smoke in high school. But whatever. I got busted by my niece, who kept my secret until my habit took over and I threw caution to the wind and smoked in public again. Wow where people disappointed.

So I decided to take charge again. This time I knew I need chemical help to get this monkey off my back. They say that nicotine is harder to quit than cocaine etc. Can’t personally compare, but I wouldn’t be surprised. One more….it always drags you back. One more means you are still a smoker. Not many people can be just “social smokers”. I know I can’t.

So, I went the Chantix route. My doctor advised me about the vivid dreams I might have. Boy she wasn’t kidding! My experience on Chantix was AWESOME! First off, I quite smoking after 1 1/2 cigarettes. I kid you not. It not only turned off my nicotine receptors in my brain, it made me quite nauseous to even think about ever smoking another cigarette. Still does to this day, almost 10 years later.

But the best part was the dreams! I wrote a previous post about the dreams, they were so incredible! Realistic, colorful, rewindable, incredible dreams! I really missed them, those dreams.

Well, they’re back! I’m not sure why. For whatever reason, I am grateful. They come during a long cold winter, and add some excitement to my life. Don’t get me wrong, they are not all sunshine and puppy dog dreams. Sometimes they are very realistic dreams that hit home in my most venerable spots. Because isn’t that what dreaming is all about? Often I wake up and have to think for a minute what my reality is.

For the most part, my dreams as of late are once again full of action, color, drama etc. I try to write them down when I wake up but usually end up writing nonsensical drivel.

Oh well.  Still provides me with hours of entertainment, lol.  How are you?  Do you have vivid dreams?  Please share with the class!

Olympic skiing brings back my Franz Klammer memories….

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I skied the same downhill course as Franz Klammer.

No really. His last World Cup race was in Aspen Colorado. I skied the same hill shortly thereafter. (It took me a lot longer).

I loved watching Franz Klammer ski. He reminded me of myself, out of control and on the verge disaster most of the time. When he took Olympic Gold at Innsbruck in 1976, I was his biggest fan. He was awesome, and fearless on that downhill. Every second you expected him to fall. Probably he did too, lol. The following year, his brother would be severely injured in a ski accident, and left in a wheelchair. But Franz never gave up. It was his wild, edge of disaster ski-style that led him to many victories over many more technically advanced skiers.  It actually took a lot of control to ski that out of control!

My skiing days are over but I still appreciate watching a good Olympic run. The downhill still gives me chills. The moguls give me heart palpitations. And the new slope style is awesome!  I love the brash devil-may-care attitude!

The younger generation is all about snow boarding, and I do love watching it.  The half pipe is coming up, and I sure hope “old man” Shawn White can triumph again!  Love his new hair cut, but miss the red hair flying out behind him!

Good luck to all the USA skiers, bring back medals, but stay safe!

Here’s your online hottie!

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For all you online daters out there, here is the man behind the keyboard.

No, seriously.  I think online dating is great, been there done that myself.  However….until you really meet the person, you never know.

I am a pro at picking out the scammers.  There are so many tells.  The picture they stole from a modeling site.  The hair and eye color descriptions that are different from the picture.  The broken English.  Professing to have lost a loved one and therefore will treasure you and they needs your love so bad.  Love just oozing all over the screen.

Also, they never want to meet you.  They just want to adore you from afar, and message back and forth.

Oh, and at some point, they may ask you for money.  These are the foreign ones, that have lost all their money in Nigeria and need help getting home so they can marry you and worship at your altar.

Not all men on these dating sites are like this.  Some are perfectly normal.  Online dating is quite the acceptable way to meet a new partner in life.  I have met some very people online, and dated my share of them.  None of my Mikes though.  Right now I would say I’m pretty much single, and happy about it.  (Did you read my Mikes posts?  Here’s a link  http://wp.me/p1J9S2-sI

Sometimes I still get emails from the old dating sites I was on, most notably Match.com.  Sometimes I wonder how they matched me up with certain people.  Their attributes were certainly not in my search criteria.  But it makes for some fun surfing.  Do men really think that a picture of themselves in front of the bathroom mirror is going to garner them some dates?  And talk about grumpy old men.  Some haven’t’ cracked a smile in years.  And most are wearing flannel shirts or old T-shirts, depending on the season.  For crikey sake, comb your hair, put a decent shirt on, and smile at the damn camera!

Of course you do get the camera happy ones whose pictures are in front of their fancy cars or motorcycles.  This type usually has a lot of gold dripping from their necks and wrists.  It’s all on display, for your viewing pleasure.  I’m sure many women are adding it all up with $ signs in their eyes.

Right before the last Iraq war, I was attracted to a picture of an Army pilot standing in front of his helicopter with his crew. He lived in Tennessee, so I wasn’t planning on anything long distance, but I just wanted to say hello and thank you for protecting our country. That started up a two-year relationship, the first year only online while he was fighting in Iraq. We met when he came back home, on Valentine’s Day. It was very romantic 😉  He is the tall one in the middle 🙂

Dan

(I need to learn how to edit my picture scans, sorry!)
So, you just never know. But ladies, be careful out there, for you will never know what you will get until you met him in flesh and blood! Good luck!

Kitty Condo Conundrum

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There’s trouble in Paradise. In the kitty condo, pictured above.

When I first got the condo, both cats were ecstatic. They had a snuggle place all to themselves, instead of sharing momma’s bed.
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They slept in their condo together every night, and sometimes for their afternoon cat nap. There was always a cat or two in there.

Then something happened. Neither one will go in there. Not even for treats or catnip.

At first I thought maybe it was dirty or something, so I washed the removable bed pad. Nope, it wasn’t that.

So it must have been a cat fight. A real doozy. Neither one of them are talking about it, so I’m afraid to ask. I notice they have been sleping on separate sides of my bed. Ozzy on the left, under the covers with Momma. Izzy on the right, typically on top of my hip. Things were definitely a little chilly, and it wasn’t about the Polar Vortex.

I went right to the source, and asked each of them what happened.  They’re not talking.

I have noticed a bit of a warm-up between them lately, and they are now snuggling together for their afternoon naps. I hope eventually they will wander back into their condo. It’s so cute.

Plus, Momma paid good money for that condo!

True confessions of a blog writer

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I leave a pad and pen by my bed because I will wake up after a great dream and think of a perfect topic, and want to write it down before it leaves my head. Then I wake up in the morning and all I see is jibberish. Reminds me of the time I was in the hospital after surgery and trying to write about my experience while on heavy drugs! lol.

It’s not easy being a blogger.  You write stories and put them out there for the whole world to see.  Some of your stories are light-hearted.  Some of your stories are full of your emotions, good and bad.  Some of your stories are full of your pain.  And sometimes, actually most of the time, the world could care less.

It is hard to get a following.  People might read your blog, but never *like or comment on it.  And it’s all about the stats when it comes to being a so-called “successful” blogger.  I have seen some bloggers go viral overnight because of ONE particular blog they wrote.  I have seen some bloggers who post new stories every day and have very few followers.  Followers are fickle.  It hard to figure out what moves them enough to follow you, and to stay involved enough to comment, and discuss, and argue, and really think about the material.

Most popular bloggers have thousands of followers and hundreds of comments for each post.  They have lovers and haters, both of which just increase their popularity.  They may be popular right out of the box, or they may have been posting for years.

I will admit I am jealous of these popular bloggers.  Sometimes I write a story that I think will touch the hearts of millions, but nobody reads them.  So then I get discouraged, and don’t post new stories regularly.  Which just leads to any progress I had made to just peter out.

I guess I have just not found my niche yet.  I tend to flit around in my blog posts, and write about everything in general and nothing in particular.  And actually, this post was going to be something entirely different, until I started writing it.  My fingers just start typing, and I let them go wherever.  Maybe I should be more disciplined.  Maybe I just don’t know.

Here’s the thing.  It’s hard to know if you are doing right or wrong if you get no feedback.  I have people tell me that they read my blog and love it, but I had no way of knowing that.  Unless someone comments, or likes, I have no idea who reads my blog.

Now I sound like I am whining and complaining that nobody reads my blog.  That was not my original purpose on writing this particular post.  But a girl could use some validation.  Right?

Please let me know your thoughts on my blog.  It would help point me in the right direction, and whether or not I should pursue my writing.

So then I laughed so hard I almost passed out!

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It’s true.  It’s  a real problem here in America.  People laughing so hard they pass out.  Sometimes it’s hard to tell if they are laughing or crying.  Or both.

People, it has happened to me.  Often.  And it’s no laughing matter.

If it happens at home, it’s only my cats I have to worry about seeing me.  When it happens in public, my laughing starts off a chain reaction that keeps circling back around to me, and makes me laugh even more, until no sound comes out, and no breathing either.  I just shake uncontrollably, until I almost pass out, and then finally I take a breath, and start all over.  You know, like a crying baby who holds their breath.  Whew.

It’s not an easy thing.  The next day, I will have sore stomach muscles.  It is a very intense workout.

Also, it is contagious.  To myself.  Once I start laughing, it’s hard for me to stop for very long.

It happened to me tonight, for over an hour.  An hour of The Best of Jimmy Fallon will do that to you.  I will never be the same again.  I am so glad I was alone.  Except for the cats.  The poor cats.  I’ll most likely be sleeping alone tonight.

But it really wasn’t my fault.  Jimmy Fallon is insanely talented, and him and Justin Timberlake doing #hashtag?  Comedic genius.  Sometimes I think JT is wasted as a singer.  And sometimes I think JF is wasted as a talk show host.  They both could be singers, dancers, actors….anything.  A N Y T H I N G.

Anyway.  Before JF, it happened to me at the Nail Salon.  I was getting a pedicure, and I warned the girl to massage my feet BEFORE she started scrubbing them.  She just bobbed her head up and down and got busy scrubbing my feet.  I feel bad, but it was her fault my leg might have kicked her in the head, prompting gales of laughter from this girl.  Pretty soon the whole salon was joining in.  And, well, I have previously explained what happens then.  It wasn’t pretty.  I could have drowned.

ROFLMAO.