Dave’s not here


Seeing Tommy Chong on Dancing With the Stars this season has brought back some great memories!  Who remembers this skit from Cheech and Chong?

“Knock knock knock

Who is it

It’s me, Dave, open up man, I’ve got the stuff


Right man, Dave, now will you open up the door?

Dave’s not here.”

Dave kitty

I thought this was the funniest thing when I was a freshman in college.  So my roommate Fonzie and I were sitting around our first Saturday night at school, bored, as we didn’t really know anybody yet.  We decided to prank call some “Daves”.  We got out the campus directory, and started dialing.  Most Daves didn’t play along, so we hung up on them, obviously they weren’t fun or good sports.  But I hit the jackpot with one Dave, who played right along.  (He must have been the recipient of similar conversations, lol.)  So anyway after talking and laughing on the phone for awhile, he wanted to meet up with us.  I told him I didn’t go out with strangers.  (But I didn’t seem to have any problem calling them up, ha!).  He said, I’ll be outside your dorm in 5 minutes, you can check me out and if you like what you see you can come out and meet me.

Well, I lived in the all girls dorm, nicknamed The Virgin Islands, on the 6th floor.  He lived in the coed dorm across the way.  After much giggling, my roommate and I did indeed see him standing outside in the court yard, waving to us.

Gulp.  Hubba Hubba!  Now, I lived in the Virgin Islands for good reason.  I was a good Catholic girl, and had never been on a real date, and was still waiting for my first real kiss.  Pathetic, I know.  So now I’m looking down on this drop dead gorgeous guy waving at me, and I couldn’t get downstairs fast enough.  Fonzie and I talked with him and his friend, and they invited us to go to an outdoor party in their quad.  We went with them, as they seemed like nice normal guys.

Wow.  I had the time of my life.  I can STILL remember every. single. moment.  Dave and I had instant chemistry.  He was tall, dark and handsome.  Funny.  Smart.  You know, the whole package.  I felt like I hit the jackpot, first week at school!

We got a beer from the keg.  My first beer, my first keg.  A night of firsts!  We sat down on grassy hillside to talk.  He started calling me Lady Guinevere, and I called him Sir Lancelot, because he was my knight in shining armor who rescued me from boredom in my dorm.

Some guys from his dorm had fireworks, so as it got dark, he went and got a couple of blankets from his room.  We laid back on the hillside and snuggled, watching the fireworks.  I can still remember it like it was yesterday.

Now I know what you’re thinking.  Cause I was thinking the same thing in the back of my mind.  Dark, starry night.  Handsome guy.  Pretty girl.  Beer.  Blanket.  What comes next?

Well my first kiss, of course!  It was…..incredible.  Awesome.  Life changing.  I felt like a real woman, for the first time in my life.

Now I know what you’re thinking.  First kiss.  What other “firsts” will I reach tonight?

My momma taught me well.  Or should I say scared me well.  I could hear her voice in the back of my mind, see her face.  She was always so concerned about me and my sister, and our reputations.  She was conscious of what people would think about our family.  And here I was, away from her all-seeing, all-knowing eyes, at college.  What would I do?  Would I continue on my night of firsts?

No.  Of course not.  I was a good Catholic girl, and he was a good Catholic boy, who was a true gentleman!  I never even had to stop him, we just kissed and snuggled, and it was very innocent.  He truly was my knight in shining armor.


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