I coulda won that Funniest Home Video….


Picture this in your mind. But add flames shooting out from both sides of the cat.

This really happened in my house some years back. My old Vanna cat jumped up on the end table. On top of a lit candle. We both realized at the same time that she was on fire. She looked at me, I looked at her, I screamed, and she took off running down the hall.

And so did both my retrievers. Typically the dogs and the cat lived in peace, as Vanna was older and slow, and gave the dogs no reason to chase her. But add some screams and running, and both dog’s prey instincts kicked in, and they took off after her down the hall, with momma bringing up the rear.

The faster she ran, the more it fanned the flames shooting out from either side.  I’ve never seen her run so fast, but I guess you would too if you were on fire with two huge dogs chasing you.  I was screaming at her to stop, and screaming at the dogs to stop, but we all went full tilt until we hit the bedroom.

She leaped up onto the bed to escape the dogs, I immediately flipped her over and beat the flames out. She was still smoking pretty bad so I carried her to the kitchen sink and sprayed her down with the faucet hose. I furiously dug through her stinky wet fur to find her skin and see how bad her burns were. Nothing. She was not burned at all.

But boy did she stink like burnt wet cat fur! I had to take the scissors and cut off all of her pretty long belly fur. This was a feisty old cat who had never had so much as a bath!

We all survived, the dogs had great fun, thought it was a game, the poor old cat didn’t jump on things too often after all that.

Too bad I didn’t have a video cam on, I would have won that $10,000 for sure!

She was a good old cat. Miss my Vanna.