A blind guy update…..

blind

Well it’s been a few weeks since Al the blind guy was here and we chatted for hours, again.  As you all know, because you read my blog faithfully, after he left I felt such a letdown.

A few days went by, and I got a call from the store wanting me to do a survey on my experience with the installer.  Of course I gave him all favorable comments.  A few days after that……..

I got a text from him.

A:  Thanks so much for the great review!  It was my pleasure to interact with you, in so many ways!

Wow.  So.  I thought about it for a few days, and then a sent a response:

Me:  Hi Al, you’re welcome, please don’t take this the wrong way, but after you left the last time I felt really sad that I was never going to see you again. You are a really nice guy and I enjoyed talking to you.  Ah C’est la Vie.

I was really nervous after sending that text, and kept checking my phone for a response.  I also felt guilty, and prayed his girlfriend didn’t have access to his phone.  That might be hard to explain, even tho it was “innocent”.  I know what it is like to be cheated on, and never want to cause a woman pain.  But I felt I had to do this, because girlfriends don’t last forever, and I wanted to at least plant the seed in his mind in case he ever became single.

So I waited.  A couple of days lately, I got this response:

A:  I’m sure that will not be the last time.  It was wonderful meeting you as well.

Ahhhhhh.  The perfect response, no?  Non-committal, non-romantic, perfectly innocent and friendly.

So again I waited to respond.  Don’t want to sound pushy.  A rapid response might send him running for the hills.  So far our texts have been a few days apart, a proper waiting period for “friends”.   A couple of days later, the perfect opportunity arose.  My Ozzy cat, who had a mutual affection with him, got sick and went to the ER vet.  While I was there waiting for hours, I decided to send a text back…..

Me:  Your buddy my Ozzy cat is really sick he has “an abnormally small bladder” and is on all kinds of meds. Poor kitty. Just my luck I get all the sick animals because God knows I will take care of them.

This time he responded right away.

Al:  Oh no tell my buddy I will bring him a special treat next time I see him!

Hmmmm.  Next time.  He’s talking next time.  Meaning he intends to come over again.  Right?  Maybe yes.  Maybe no.  Just words.  Nothing definite.  Next time could be years from now.  So I waited to respond.  A week I waited.

Me:  Ozzy would love to see you again!

So now Ozzy and I wait.  I don’t want Ozzy to get his hopes up, because he really really likes the blind man.  He loves to rub all over him, and Al knows just what he likes……

Excuse me, my mind wandered off for a moment…..oh to be a cat!

I’ll be sure to keep you posted on my stimulating text relationship with the blind guy!

 

 

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“Social” media – REDUX

“This one will never get old”

Facebook can be a sad reflection on the state of society.  I initially joined Facebook with the intent of keeping my circle of friends intimate and primarily for picture updates of far away family members and networking.  But, like so many other things, all that went by the wayside in the interest of ever-growing information.

The friends list grew.  Friends of friends.  Relatives. Co-workers. (Bad idea in general).  Anyway, the list grows on and on and takes on a life of its own.  Pretty soon you are drawn into the silly statuses of people who you could care less about in real life.  Joe Blow got drunk last night.  Susie Smith is bored.  Oh, and the pictures!  Pictures of Joe Blow and all his underage drinking buddies drunk and disorderly, holding up a variety of liquor cans and bottles with drunk ass smirks on their faces.  Pictures of Silly Susie Smith taking care of her boredom by posting 15 million pictures of her face at different angles.

That is all fine and dandy.  No big deal.  But what about when you DO see a big deal, written or graphically pictured on Facebook?  The above-mentioned underage drinkers.  The next day hangovers.  The fights.  The public break-ups.  The status changes, back and forth.   The snarky comments intentionally meant to hurt someone.  The BULLYING.  People have lost LIVES over this.

What if you see something that you don’t agree with?  Or that you think will hurt someone?  Should you stay quiet?  Should you tell?  If you tell, then you will no longer be “trusted”.  If you don’t tell, and something bad happens as a result, can you live with yourself?

Do you REALLY want to know all this shit???????  People (myself included) have a tendency to post TMI about their lives on Facebook.  Do you want your mother reading it?  How about your boss?  How about your spouse?  If the answer is no, then you probably shouldn’t post it.   Younger people don’t realize that what you post on the internet is FOREVER.  FOR F’ing EVER.  Once you hit Enter, or press Send, you can’t take it back.  You can delete it, sure.  But it will be flying around in cyberspace FOREVER.

Let’s say you apply for a job.  One of the first things a SMART company will do, in addition to background checks and references, is look for your Facebook page.  And unless you have it privatized pretty securely, they are going to see your drunk ass partying it up, all the F bombs you let fly, and all the lingo you use that pass as your language.  Some of which I just don’t get, but that’s another matter.  Anyway, some companies now are insisting on your Facebook password.  I think it’s in the courts right now.  Who knows what the result will be.  It may already be too late for you.  But if you are a teenager or young adult, you know everything, so who am I to tell you?

I think you can tell a lot about a person on how they use Social Media.  Facebook, Twitter, blogging etc.,…….it’s all there for you to see.  And read.  And make a conscious or sub-conscious decision about someone or something.  Does EVERYBODY really need to know EVERYTHING?  No.  They don’t.  And they shouldn’t.  Some things are better left unsaid.  And unseen.  Every now and then you need to take inventory and remove the bad thing(s).   (Trust me, I thank GOD that in my day we had nothing to document our drinking binges in colleges with, or I would be quite embarrassed!   But then again, maybe I would have seen how stupid I looked.  Nah, lol)   Drunk dialing was bad enough bad then.  Now we just drunk text.  Also.  So many ways to be a stalker nowadays!  lol

I write blog stories about my life and social commentary on things that catch my attention.  Sometimes people make fun of them.  Sometimes people like them.  Either way is fine with me, I try not to be too obnoxious.  At least with a blog, you have to make a conscious effort to subscribe, or click on a link, before it’s all up in your face, lol.

So next time you feel the need to “share”, think about who, what, where, when and why you are sharing the particular information.  There are many, many things I love about Social Media, and don’t know how I ever lived without Google, seeing all the cute pictures of kids and puppies and amazing videos, finding long-lost high school friends, sharing pictures of my Ozzy and Bri (my two fav camera uploads), and reconnecting with family I haven’t seen in years and years.  None of this would ever happen without all this high-tech stuff we now take for granted.  I am “online” in so many ways….desktop, laptop, Nook Color tablet, smartphone…..I am always available.  Even when I am not.

Dear Author……..

Yesterday I got an email.  It started out with Dear Authors…….and I was one of them!

Even better, the email requested my bio.  Yes, that’s right.  MY BIO.  Things about me that people will read.  In a BOOK.

My hands trembled as I tried to compose myself enough to compose a bio.  You see, this is the first time I ever had to write a bio.  I didn’t know what to write.  I didn’t want to sound lame and be all like “Janet Heath is a wonderful woman and the best writer in the world and now you all know it too!”  But I didn’t want to sound pathetic either like “Janet Heath still can’t believe she is in this book because who would want to read anything she wrote?”  So I tried to write something about myself that would show my love of reading and writing.  Hopefully I succeeded.  My editor liked it, so I guess it wasn’t too lame.

My dream is coming true.  I am about to become a published author.  Pinch me now.

Exorcise Nicki – REDUX

I posted this a year ago after the Grammy’s.  I didn’t like Nicki then, and I don’t like her now, especially on American Idol.  She doesn’t belong there.  She is a joke.  But that’s just my opinion.  I could be wrong.

I never liked Nicki Minaj much.  Now I don’t like her at all.  She is just too in-your-face-disgustingly-gross.  If she was going for the shock factor ala Lady Gaga at the Grammys last night, she was successful.

Successful in shocking people.  Not necessarily successful in making her a star.  In fact, I think she did a good job in tarnishing her image.  A great job.

The younger generation won’t agree.  They love her even more.  She is the flavor of the month.  I don’t think they realize how blasphemous and disrespectful some of these “singers” are.  I hesitate to call Nicki a singer, she is more of a rapper.  She can spit out words faster than I can understand them, but it must be because I am old.

I wonder if the Grammys would have allowed her to mock the music used in the Islamic call to prayers. Her “pope” would be the prophet Mohammad and the performance would be as reverent and as elevating as the riff they did on Adeste Fideles last night .  Or maybe insult Judaism.  Whatever.  I found it to be offensive, regardless of what religion she was insulting.  I guess if you can’t dazzle them with brilliant singing, then baffle them with religious bullshit, eh Nicki?

Adam Lambert was shunned from musical appearances a couple of years ago because he kissed another man.  I guess that is worse than impersonating a bishop and exorcising demons on stage.  And worse than beating up your girlfriend in a fit of anger like Chris Brown, who was welcomed back with open arms, and even won a Grammy.  How quickly we forgive and forget in some cases.  Having said that, I do think Chris Brown is VERY talented and has unbelievable dance moves, and I think he is truly sorry for his actions.  (Jan, how do you know that, have you talked to him?  No, but I think his humble acceptance shows it).  Or worse than girl-on-girl kissing like Madonna and Britney. I don’t understand why mainstream hasn’t embraced Adam Lambert.  He has one of the BEST male voices EVER in my opinion.  I would LOVE to see a duet with him and J Hud or Lea Michele.  I reckon Adam is too flamboyantly gay for the music industry, altho gay seems to be very popular in other arenas.

All in all, with the exception of Nicki and a few other people I had no idea about, I enjoyed the Grammys.  J Hud was brilliant in her tribute to Whitney.  Adele is just…Adele.  The voice of a generation.  Beautiful, and yet shyly humble too.  Oh and loves to throw out a few swears, and snot too, all in a highly entertaining British accent.  Gotta love it.

My entry to The Jacket – A Call to Arms REDUX

This was an entry to a contest.  At the time I wrote it, I didn’t know who would win.  I didn’t.  But I still think it was a damn good blog story!  I hope you will agree….

I entered a blog contest.  The “judge” bought a green plaid jacket at the Goodwill, and when she got home she found a clean folded kleenex and a scap of paper with the name Tom Wojciechowski written on it.  Our assignment was to write a story about how the name came to be in the pocket.  Here was my entry, that was posted last Friday:  (The winner has not been declared yet).

green plaid jacket

Tom Wojciechowski.  A name that will live in infamy.  A name that came to mean the world to me, in a time when the date itself would live in infamy.

It was 1943 and my old friend Bob Hope talked me into going on tour with the girls.  So Betty Grable, Marlene Deitrich and I jumped a cargo plane to go entertain our troops in the middle of WW II.  It was a whirlwind in more ways than one.

It was after a show, and the girls and I loved to give the troops an extra surprise and dance with as many of those fine lads as possible.  Even though our feet were hurting in our high heels, and our stockings were starting to sag, we put as much energy as we could into jitterbugging along.

It was one of those nights when I met Tom Wojciechowski.  A tall, skinny G.I. with the bluest eyes I had ever seen.  He shyly approached and asked his buddy if he could cut in.  Boy that kid could jitterbug!   After a few rounds on the dance floor we adjourned to the makeshift bar for a cool drink.  And he started to talk.

We talked for hours and hours, long after the dance was over.  He was the most interesting young man I had ever met.  I admired his courage in face of such adversity in the war.

All too soon, the sun came up, and it was time for him to go.  He took out a scrap of paper and wrote his name, Tom Wojciechowski.  He carefully folded into a clean Kleenex and handed it to me.  I put it into my jacket pocket, and we both went on our way.  Me to rest a bit before my next show that night, and he to go on a mission, his “call to arms”.

That evening, I searched the crowd for his face.  I did not see him.  I asked about him later at the dance.  One of his comrades told me sorrowfully that Tom never came back from his mission.  He was MIA.  My heart clenched at that thought, and I fingered the scrap of paper still residing in my pocket.  I swore that I would look at his name, Tom Wojciechowski, every day, until he came home.

That scrap of paper went everywhere with me for years and years, always in my pocket, in a fresh Kleenex.  He never came home.  In 1955 when I sang Somewhere Over the Rainbow, I silently dedicated the song to him, Tom Wojciechowski, a name I never fogot.  My name?  Judy Garland.

What becomes of the broken-hearted? REDUX

Been thinking a lot about this lately ever since my sister’s husband died right before Christmas.  They were married for 36 years.  She misses him so much.  It will take awhile to put a smile back on her face.  I grieve for her too…..

When people say they could just die from a broken heart, listen to them. They are right.  Broken Heart Syndrome is now a bona fide condition.  How often have you heard of a grieving spouse dying shortly after their loved one?  Research has shown that they are more likely to suffer a heart condition.

When people are grieving over the loss of a loved one due to a variety of circumstances such as death, divorce, break-up, etc., they are likely not to take very good care of themselves.  They can become depressed, not eat or take their meds and get less sleep.  All of which can be a recipe for disaster.

Intense grief brings on psychological stress, increased heart rate, blood pressure, and clotting, and there you have a perfect recipe for a heart attack or stroke.  This can lessen over time, but grief has its timetable for each individual.
I know for myself that grieving takes a long, long time.  I still grieve over my divorce from ten years ago, and at the time I literally prayed for death to come and take the pain away.  The pain WAS physical, not just emotional.  It took me more than a year to feel like any semblance of my former self.  I felt like I aged visibly ten years almost overnight.  My swollen eyes never bounced back and left me with more wrinkles etc.  It really took its toll on me.  Now I know that I was NOT crazy as some people told me.  It is a real condition.  Of course, I could have told you that years ago.
The death of my 3 beloved pets last year made me physically ill for days after each one.  I still cry buckets of tears over them, and give myself headaches and swollen eyes and I can FEEL my heart aching.
They say that time heals all wounds.  I will say the initial intense pain does gradually subside, but it never goes away entirely.  It leaves physical and emotional scars on your heart and your brain and your soul.   You can never go back to what you once were.  You can only go forward and be a better person for what you have experienced.

Dear Mr. Match.com Dad……. REDUX

Another re-post, as I’m still getting those “Please come back to Match.com emails”.  But why should I?

Once a man reaches a certain age, I think it normal for most people to assume that you have an offspring or two tucked away somewhere.  Most people will also assume that your children are the lights of your life, as it should be.  These men may be widowed or divorced, and may be very involved in their children’s lives, as it also should be.  But if you are fiftysomething, hopefully they are not toddlers, lol.  Usually they are teenagers or older.

So why do you feel it is necessary to court women on a dating site with a name like “SashasDad” or “FatherofTen”?  Is it to let a potential date know immediately that you are just a dad looking for another mother?  I see so many profiles that start off with…..”Father of ten wonderful children, some still live at home, the others are off at a very expensive college, so I figured I could use a second income and some maid/chauffeur/cook services again, so I figured I’d give this online dating a shot.  My friends all tell me that I am still a real catch, even though I list brown hair on my profile and my pictures all show all white, or no hair.  Oh, and I know my profile says I’m in toned and athletic, so just overlook that beer belly, my New Year’s Resolution is to get back in shape (cue music:  Girl look at that body…I’m sexy and I know it).  Also I hope you love the pictures of me with my ex cut out, or leaning on my Vette or sitting on my Harley, or snuggling with my teacup poodle”  Wow.  I’m definitely winking at that guy!

Now before all you guys out there get your underpants in a bunch, I know that women lie too.  Everybody lies on Match.com.  If you don’t need to lie, then you probably have no reason to be on Match.com.  In my own travels over the years on dating sites, I have determined that most men who are divorced or never married are that way for a reason.  Everyone has a fatal flaw.  But when they get into the double digits……just sayin’.  I’ll stay single.  I’ve very happy being single.  My pets give me unconditional love, and don’t cheat, drink, belch, fart, swear, talk back, snore, etc.  Men have their uses and purpose in life, and there are a lot of VERY GOOD men out there (Hey SD!) and they are excluded from my generalizations here.  So for me, a friend with benefits is all I need, unless I run across someone who sweeps me off my feet, which will NOT be as easy task!

Let’s see, where was I……ok all you men out there looking for a hot date, come up with a better profile name for yourself that makes a woman want to actually click on you!

The Stalker

JackalShe lies in wait, patiently stalking her prey.  Watching his every move.  Plotting his next sighting.  And when she gets her shot, it makes all the waiting worth while.

Man Hunter.  Man Stalker.  It takes a special breed of woman to plot her strategies in the face of all kinds of roadblocks.  Like a wife.  But that never stops the determined ones.

The determined ones have a steely one-track mind.  How to win the prize.  They plastered his picture up at their work so they can adore him daily.  They weasel their way into his favorite activities, like fishing.  They go on a fad diet to lose the pudge they usually carry.  Then the real work begins.

They ply the target with alcohol, his main weakness and addiction, time after time, knowing it drives the wedge further into the relationship with the wife.  They have observed how the prey becomes drunk and stupid.

drunk

And when the timing is right, they strike.  They let nothing stop them, not even the man’s little boy as a witness to the total lack of morals and values that was to follow.  They gave no thought to the pain they would cause.

snake

The prey took the bait, just as she knew he would.  She had done her homework well.  He swallowed her in, hook, line and sinker.  This one she would not throw back.

fish

They did not plan on getting caught that night.  Or did they?  Hard to know what machinations drive the stalker mind.  The prey was such an easy target.  Almost too easy.  She could toy with him, like a cat with a mouse.  A little more alcohol and she was the puppet master.

What followed after the stalker’s successful hunt was the usual bloody carnage left behind.  The spoils of a kill are not a pretty picture, so we shall not dwell further on the pain and suffering that followed.  Suffice it to say that it was quite considerable.

On the one hand, she was a good stalker.

On the other hand she was the worst kind of stalker.  The husband stealing kind.

Toddle THIS Tiara Mama! REDUX

Haha, I wrote this before Honey Boo Boo became a big TV star, her second season starts up soon.  Hillbilly TV has never been better!

Meet Honey Boo Boo Child Alana from Toddlers and Tiaras.  She is 6 years old.

This is Alana’s Boo Boo Mama mom Shannon. 

Pageants are hard work, and this is what gives BOO BOO her GO GO

After all the GO GO, then BOO BOO struts her stuff on stage

Sometimes even BOO BOO MAMA gets in on the act

Isn’t that sweet? But all that sweet GO GO gives BOO BOO a BELLY

Even Dr. Drew hates it

I think a picture is worth a thousand words.  So no need to explain anything.  My work here is done.

2013 is on!

goals

This is it.  Now or never.  New goals are written.  Plans are in place.  January is booking up.

Went to the doctor last week, with a difference.  I have health insurance now, first time in 4 years.  Many things have been neglected, now is the time to catch up.  Blood work was drawn.  Medications tweaked.  Many are gone now.  I spent most of last year weaning myself off what I thought was unecessary.  Did find out my thyroid is totally wacked out, and needed a huge dose adjustment for that.  Done.  Mammogram appointment needed.  Done.  Diet overhaul needed.  Done.  Joined Weight Watchers 360.  Crohn’s doctor appointment scheduled.  Will schedule colonoscopy.  Will look into new injectable biological meds to help both Crohn’s and Crohn’s related arthritis, which is crippling my body right now.  Join YMCA for swimming classes.  Done.  Still need to schedule skin cancer screening with oncologist, have missed 3 annual appointments, not good for someone with a history of malignant melanoma.  Naughty girl am I.  Still need to fix my damn back/leg.  Appointment calls are in.

Next up, grow my home business.  Tax season is upon us, that will help.  Design new business cards.  Check.

Most of all, write.  And write more.  And more.  Grow the book.  And keep reading the good books from the good book list.

It feels good to have a plan.  Gonna catch that tiger by the tail and shake it!

Tiger-by-the-tail